My walk has been long and exhausting. Over 6 months ago, I was on my way to a "pregnancy" doctor hopeful that my odds of getting pregnant in the future were looking up. Low and Behold, they found hints of an autoimmune disease. O
f course the dialogue was "Marrina, the results can be normal, no real alarm, but just for peace of mind, let’s send you to a rheumatologist"...."okay, sounds good doc, let’s do it"...After being on the edge of my seat, of course I asked for a copy of my results, I started googling (oh the joys of a Google education) right away.
Almost 2 months later and the day comes to see my new doc, "the rhyme" 50 voiles of blood (between the two docs) and apple juice to keep me awake, wow for not being that serious all I kept thinking was damn that’s a lot of blood. In the meantime, I am killing my brain trying to figure out why the heck they are sending 50 voiles of blood to be tested, and for some strange reason the rhyme assured me, "marrina, I don’t see any reason you would need meds". Boy-oh-Boy did that change quickly.
The magical day that changed the rest of my life is here, 11:00 on a beautiful Wednesday morning. My brain was spinning before I even left the house. The drive I think was even worse than waiting in the room, which I might add was old and full of arthritis magazines, I’m 29 I want to see some vacation magazines or at least a few People’s on the table, the presence of old lingered everywhere, but she’s the best says the pregnancy doctor.
Dr. E. enters the room, her face emotionless, in comparison to our first visit. "Marrina we have a firm diagnoses, you have Mixed Connective Tissue Disease &&&&& LUPUS". WTF did she just say? "& LUPUS" who in the hell has "& LUPUS" did I just seriously get diagnosed with more than one illness, did I hear her correctly? She must have the wrong person. She went on to explain each one of the diseases that I apparently must now own. As I sat and listen to her and she handed me literature, it all went in one ear and out another, the last thing I heard was this medication is "chronic"....again, WTH is "chronic", come to find out, it means FOREVER!!!!! phewww...that was a lot to hear in a two hour conversation, which leads me to why I am documenting my life with LUPUS & MCTD. I hope my story will reach women of all ages (90% of LUPUS patients are women), I hope to touch some lives and eventally heal from writing and sharing "my story"
.... Stay Tuned.....More Thoughts On My Road To Destiny
Yay im your your first commenter!! I'll have to add you to my sidebar :o)
Posted by: [email protected] | 07/15/2011 at 05:45 PM
How the heck do i even use this thing??
Posted by: Marrina Banday | 07/16/2011 at 12:48 PM
Sometime my girl, live doesnt make sense and often seems unfair. Its easy to say "why me?" and then we wind up, bitter, angry and often victimized. My story is similar in that at 5 years old, I was diagnosed with a Kidney disease, then at 12 Scoliosis. Life was difficult to say the least...HOWEVER...because this was my life, it was not going to be my destiny, but rather my condition. Did I feel sorry for myself? heck ya I did, and I still do, but Marina, the one thing that makes your journey different than mine, you have a HUGE support system, and a man who loves you. I wasn't so fortunate. Take what god gave you Marina and turn it into a rare diamond...unique, bright and something everyone wants! Turn yourself into that beautiful diamond...flawless! I know you can and I believe you will. I love you...Mom
Posted by: Ariana Gurrola | 07/16/2011 at 05:06 PM